Thursday, May 26, 2011

What was I thinking?

Highlights..... What was I thinking?  For those of you who know me, you have either seen pictures or seen in person my new highlights.  Not for long; I am getting my natural hair color back in a very unnatural way from the hair salon tonight.

My mom came out to visit for the day yesterday and I took the opportunity to go get my hair cut.  Wow, that sounds awful, but she does enjoy spending time with my little one who is home with me.  Not that I don't enjoy spending time with my little one, or my mom for that matter, but I need to groom, right?  I mean don't I deserve a hair cut once every 3 months? Why are you so judgmental?  I never get out by myself!  I know that the laundry should take precedent over my own vanity, so sue me!  Excuse my argument with myself. It happens daily, I really need to work on that relationship.

I was driving to the salon.... Salon sounds so hoopy-poopy, it is a place I get my hair cut next to the Giant Supermarket!  Anyway, I was feeling daring.  I was thinking 'let's go short.'  Then I remembered 1996.  It was a year of many changes for me.  I broke off a long term relationship (good change)  I moved back home for a year (bad change)  I got a new job (good change) and I cut my hair short(really bad change).  Although at the end of that year, when my hair grew back, I fell in love with my now husband. (best change in my entire life).  Back to 2011,  in my minivan, deciding I wanted a change; I thought highlights.

Now my hair is naturally a dark chocolate brown with white hair creeping in all over the place.  I don't mind the white, as it is pretty well hidden and only in certain spots.   I like my hair.  I always have.  It is the one constant thing I can count on.  Even it's frizziness is reliable.  So I asked the hair dresser if she had the time to do highlights.  Which is like asking, "hey, do you have time for me to spend $125 as opposed to $35?"  The answer was a resounding, "yes."

Fast forward to 3 hours later in my room and me crying like a baby.  My little one was napping.  I looked at myself in the mirror and said, "stop crying you dumb ass!  This is what you asked for, Carmel highlights! Now don't be so goddamn vain and buck up!" I thought I would just deal with it.  Then my husband came home.  I did not tell him I got highlights before he saw me.  His reaction was priceless.  It was a mixture of shear panic, repressed laughter, and tact.  I kind of enjoyed watching him squirm as he looked for the right words, which were "Hey, look at your hair, it's a different color. (long pause, sweet smile) Is it kaiser permanente?" Yes he was trying to be cute with the "kaiser permanente."  It was right then and there that I decided to go back to any salon and get my natural color died back onto my hair.

Now, being a somewhat liberal, somewhat feminist, this is hard to admit.  But I want my husband to find me physically attractive.  I won't change something that I like about myself in order for that to happen, but I will change something that I don't like.  So I have an appointment tonight for a re-transformation.

This is all so trivial, so ridiculous.  In the grand scheme of things this just does not matter.  There are people with real problems.  Wait, you have not been formally introduced, Blog Readers this is my Guilt, Guilt these are my Blog Readers, please leave them alone and continue to plague me.

I have anything and everything I could want and more.  Why am I looking for a change in my appearance?  If I really want to change my appearance, I need to get my ass back to my Zumba classes at the YMCA and lose some lbs!  That is the change I need.  Although is is so much easier to sit and eat.

So I am giving in to my vanity and getting my hair back.  I will hopefully feel better and my husband will sleep with me again. Not that he wouldn't but if I don't feel sexy ain't no body feeling sexy!   

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