I have written a lot on this, none of it is legible or understandable. My rage filled rants about rape culture, double standards and white priveledge are not fit to print. This is the best I could do.
The victim of the rapist, Brock Turner, wrote a very poignant and moving letter to him. It is long but should be read in its entirety. She put into words what too many have felt and dealt with in the past and will continue to deal with in the future. There were a few sentences that hit me hard.
“According to him, the only reason we were on the ground was because I fell down. Note; if a girl falls down help her get back up. If she is too drunk to even walk and falls down, do not mount her, hump her, take off her underwear, and insert your hand inside her vagina. If a girl falls down help her up. If she is wearing a cardigan over her dress don’t take it off so that you can touch her breasts. Maybe she is cold, maybe that’s why she wore the cardigan.”
Then I read the words of his parents and I see why he feels entitled. I can not even dignify their letters to the judge with a comment. I tried but I can't. Then I read his words. (That happened to change between the day after the rape and the year after the rape.) He blamed “college campus drinking culture and the sexual promiscuity that goes along with that.” WHAT?
Promiscuous is defined as: not restricted to one sexual partner
having or involving many sexual partners.
Promiscuity is very different from rape. Rape is assaulting another person with your body or an object and forcing penetration. Rape is a crime. Whether a rapist or the victim of rape is promiscuous is beside the point. There is no correlation. There is no connection. For example I could be having random sex with many partners, but the minute someone forces me to have sex with them, that is rape.
Even if having sex is something I enjoy doing.
Even if sex is something I have enjoyed doing with that person.
If I don't want to have sex with them, then they cannot force me, because that is rape, which is a crime.
The best way I have seen this explained is the tea, analogy. It is perfect.
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The ridiculous argument that, she does not remember so how do we know she didn’t consent, is so ridiculous because of the 2 men who pulled him off of a naked and unconscious woman while he was raping her! She was unconscious. No consent can be given when she is unconscious. And let’s just say for the sake of an equally ridiculous argument, that she did consent and THEN became unconscious. THEN, HE SHOULD HAVE STOPPED THE MINUTE SHE BECAME UNCONSCIOUS. If two bicycle riders could see that she was unconscious he really should have been aware of it, since he was on top of her! This is all beside the point because he was convicted. But this argument was used in the defenses' case.
In most rape cases, there are many that put the owness on the victim. Believing that because of their actions they are raped, because of their actions they deserve to be raped, because of their actions they got what was coming to them. This needs to stop.
If a promiscuous guy goes out with his friends, gets drunk, and then gets raped would anyone say the same thing? NO! And they shouldn't because he did nothing wrong. Why should it be different with women? Why does being promiscuous and getting drunk get women raped and not men? (This is not to say that this has not happened to men. Nor is it to diminish the trauma of this happening to a man.) If a man gets raped, is he going to be questioned as to what he was wearing, or how drunk he was, or about his sexual history, or what signals he was sending?
It’s exhausting that this even needs to be explained. Women are not the gatekeepers of virtuousness. Women are not the bastions of sexual morality. Women are not responsible for the actions of the men around them. Just as men are not uncontrollable sexual animals. Men are not void of human decency or incapable of being virtuous. Men have complete control over their own bodies and minds.
Why is the standard set for men so low and the standard set for women so high? How about we all do what we want with our own bodies and hold responsible, those who hurt other’s bodies? It seems pretty simple.
We can not allow society to treat rape victims as an after-thought. The judge in the case against rapist Brock Turner, gave him a sentence that would be laughable if it weren't for the fact that it’s not a joke to the victim.
Rapist Brock Turner was sentenced to 6 MONTHS at a county jail and is eligible to get out in 3 months. That is a summer camp. He will be out before Labor Day. This judge, Aaron Perksy, just so happens to believe that, “A prison sentence would have a severe impact on him … I think he will not be a danger to others.” (unless you are an unconscious woman.) Perksy cited Turner’s age and lack of criminal history as factors in his decision. Yes, let us send the message that the first rape is just a practice one and shouldn't be punished too severely. Let’s not impact the rapists life with prison on the first try.
One of the most disheartening things is that after 12 jurors UNANIMOUSLY convicted this rapist on all three counts against him. He still has no remorse. He has no culpability. He still wants to blame alcohol and lose women! He is NOT SORRY FOR RAPING AN UNCONSCIOUS WOMAN. And now, thanks to Judge Persky, he has no just punishment for the crime of which he was convicted, and shows no remorse for committing.
Is there an answer here? Is there a solution? I wish there was.